My Thoughts on Exercise

I don't know much about exercise, except that I hate it and try to do it as infrequently as I can get away with. However, with the recent passing of the holiday season and, what appears to be, the rapid halt of my metabolism, I have been forced to re-visit my dear old enemy: the treadmill. Which brought about a whole series of thoughts/observations, that I will now share...

"It's actually a good thing I ate all that pasta for dinner. You're supposed to 'carb up' before a run, right?"

"All I really need is a personal trainer. Who will come to my house every morning to drag my butt out of bed and make me skinny. For free. Is that too much to ask?"

"If I throw up while I'm on the treadmill, I'm totally adding it to my calories burned."

"Maybe one day, if I keep this up, my thighs won't slap together like that."

"If I get off to pee, I probably won't get back on. I'll just drink less water."

"I think I might just be too fat to exercise."

"There's nothing like listening to good worship music to keep my pace up! Except maybe listening to good worship music from my bed... Yeah, I can probably worship better from bed, actually. I can focus better from there."


"Next time I do this, I'm going to watch episodes of The Walking Dead and pretend I'm training for the zombie apocalypse. That should be good motivation."

"I think I can send this text and not fall off the treadmill and die."

"I really can't feel my legs."

On a more serious note, tonight was actually one of the best runs I've had in the last two weeks that I've been back at it (Yes, this is me on a good night). I ran for longer and at a faster pace. I guess the point is that it isn't easy. It isn't even fun. But while I almost always regret the times I decide to skip my workout, I never regret the times I go through with it. The times I push myself when I really don't think I can go any farther. When I stop to walk and, instead of turning the treadmill off, I jog for ten more minutes. It's not much, but it's progress. And that's the point.