I'm Not Home Yet...

Please don't think me morbid for writing on this topic, but I've been thinking a lot about about the end of life lately...(insert pause for those who want to stop reading here).
I admit, this is an odd topic for someone my age; I don't know many 23 year olds who spend as much time pondering death and eternity as I do. But I must also acknowledge that I don't know many people my age who have experienced death around them as frequently as I have in my lifetime.
I wrote the other day on my longing for the return of Christ, and there is some aspect of that I may reiterate here, but my main focus for tonight is not so much Heaven. Rather, my thoughts are more inclined toward life and its end.
Everyone's life comes to an end at some point.Obviously, we all know this is true, yet I know few people who actually live in the reality of that truth. For example, I lead a small group of high school girls on Wednesday nights. Last week we spent some time discussing the mysteries of the rapture and one girl provided this insight: "I really just want to live to be about 99 years old, and then, the night before I were to die, I want Jesus to come back!" Another girl mentioned, "If I could just grow up, go to college, get married, have some kids, and watch them grow up a little bit, then I would be excited for the rapture."
This is not just the attitude of 14 year old girls, either. I know several people who have been married and had kids who still feel as if there are more life events that they want to experience before the return of Christ. And especially before death.
Now, I am not implying that young teens should begin planning the end of their lives. But the point is just that - it's impossible to plan the end of life! None of us know anything about when we'll hear the trumpet sound, or when we'll take our last breath. My grandfather was given two months to live - roughly two weeks later, we were at his funeral. My brother David, who is far wiser than I, tweeted shortly thereafter, "All of us are potentially within a week of our funeral. May we not waste our lives." While we shouldn't live in fear of that knowledge, leery of any possible danger lurking around every corner, we should live soberly, knowing that at any moment, we could be called to meet our Savior.
How, then, should we live? Worshipfully. Which I don't think is a word, but go with it.
If there is one thing I have learned in the last year, and trust me, there's way more than one, it's that God has me where I am in my life for one ultimate purpose - to make me more like Christ. No matter what I feel, or how difficult what I'm going through is, I can live in the knowledge that God is bringing me through this life so that I may one day be like His Son. And living in that knowledge, in the knowledge of not only what Christ has done for me, but also what He is presently doing for me, content in what He's doing in me now and looking for where He will lead me next, is what I think it means to live worshipfully.
From my perspective, death is not to be feared. Yes, at the very least the fact that death is unknown is scary. But life is also unknown. And I actually find death comforting. Not in a suicidal, "this life is awful and I want it to end," manner. But it just feels like going home. It feels like an honor to be called into the presence of Christ. And while I cherish this chapter on Earth, my soul truly longs for the next chapter in Heaven. To once again borrow from the wisdom of my older brother, it feels like the family reunion is coming. And I, for one, cannot wait.
So here's my prayer - that no matter when Christ comes or I take my final breath, whether tonight or 70 years from now, that I will be found in a state of worship. That I will, at all times, give in to the goodness of God, and the good things He has for me. That death will simply be a transition of one breath of worship to the next. That Christ's return will simply invoke a conversion of my earthly worship to a far greater heavenly one. And that I will live in awareness that this is not my home, and in anticipation of arriving home at any moment.